Homemade jail moonshine

(Holy water)

As a preface, if you’d like to know what it was really like for me to teach two nights each week at the Bristol Jail for nearly a quarter of a century, then simply watch the movie, O’ Brother Where Art Thou’. Throughout that production … the characters Everett, Pete, and Delmar provide an exemplary example of portraying a perfectly representational cross-section of the many inmate personalities I taught over the years down at Bristol’s Crossbar Hotel. The men I taught at the jail were not generally evil men (yes, there was always an exception or two). In fact, I would not even hesitate to call the majority of them “good ol’ boys”. Very few of them were even what I’d call bad. They were just on the wrong track. I didn’t try to change who they were. I only hoped that I could show them a more lawful way to go through life, if they so chose. No, it wasn’t all fun and games. Living in a crowded cage is not a life I’d choose for anyone. But, man oh man! We did manage to stir up a good share of fun while I was teaching those good ol’ boys. Following is a sample of some fun they managed to stir up all by themselves:

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One particular night I drove down to the jail to hold my weekly (very informal) Bible study service for the inmates. (For many years I served as a volunteer for the Good News Jail and Prison Ministry, in addition to my work as the GED instructor/teacher for the inmates.)

However, I was soon to discover that inmate Jimmy had duly commenced the service that evening before I arrived . . .

The instant I walked in the back door of the jail, the deputies on shift hurriedly motioned me over to the control center -the place where we could view through a video camera the goings on in any cell block we chose. The deputies were laughing so hard they did well to walk, let alone talk.

Finally a deputy managed to spit out the following words to me, “You won’t need to have church tonight, Mr. Talley. As you can see back in seven block, they’re already havin’ quite a service!”

If it’s true that a picture speaks a thousand words . . .

then a good video might be worth ten thousand.

I watched as inmate Jimmy stood on a crate in seven block, slinging his arms mightily through the air, joyfully singing the old Southern Baptist hymn, “There’s Power in the Blood.”

The other inmates could be seen staggering around the cell, seemingly immune to every care in the world, singing cheerily along. (I somewhat hesitate to proclaim all I heard to be properly defined as “singing”. Some of the inmates sounded more as if they were touched by the Spirit and vocalizing “in an unknown tongue”.)

Each time the seven block congregation neared the end of a verse, Preacher Jimmy’s gyrations would nearly wobble him off his crate, uh … I mean pulpit.

From the Book of Incarcerations, chapter two, verse twelve: “And behold, I say unto thee, Brother Jimmy, should thou wavereth or faltereth the slightest bit, many a flailing hand of thy flock awaiteth faithfully alongside, ready to propeth thee back onto thy pulpit.”

It began to dawn on me that the Seven Block Disciples were privy to something not customarily served to the inmates at the jail. They were into “the Spirit” alright . . . a spirit that delivered a white light. Preacher Jimmy and his gleeful flock had assembled to baptize their innards with their own sacred brand of holy water - otherwise known as homemade jail moonshine.