Too Lazy to Swat Flies

Want to know a 100%-guaranteed, absolutely fool-proof, perfect recipe to ruin your child’s life?

Let ‘em become lazy.

You don’t think a lot of parents do that? Come to school with me on any given day. Watch when I ask some children to write their name, draw a straight line, or (heaven forbid) stoop to pick up something they have dropped on the floor.

I can teach rowdy. Lordamighty, I taught jail inmates for nearly 25 years.

I can teach intellectually hindered. I will find a way to reach them. I always do.

I can teach smelly kids, abused kids, hungry kids, kids with disabilities, and kids of any ethnicity or religion. I taught them every day for decades.

Just don’t send me lazy ones. Because…if you do…there’s not a whole lot I can do with them.

By the time I got a lazy kid - even as early as 3rd grade - their ship was out to sea. They were already lost, as far as excelling in school or in life. Not always, of course. But most of the time.

(And all this coming from someone who believes EVERYONE can change their behavior.  Ah, but bone-deep laziness is an altogether different disease. I found that it’s pretty much “terminal” to all things worthwhile in this life.)

I remember having a meeting with the parent of a child who was so lazy they did well to wipe when they went to the restroom. Wanting to follow protocol, I suppose, my principal kept using the word “unmotivated” during the meeting to describe the child. But neither the mother nor the child were “getting it”.

I finally had enough. I stood up and said, “Ms. _____, I love your sweet little boy. But he is too lazy to swat a fly off his arm!”